Many don’t do it for money. They’re on the radio either because their ego is bigger than Rush Limbaugh’s formerly nicotine-stained jockey shorts or they are suffering from a personality disorder which they feel can only be treated by subjecting the rest of us to their neurotic nuances. They crave adulation and adoration and are attracted to fame – even if it means working the overnight weekend shift on AM 1030 in Cow Nuts, Iowa. They are the "weirdo-wacko-wannabes". (By the way: that’s a medical term.)
Deep down inside, they know it’s just a matter of time before the world discovers their talent and they’ll be elevated into their own nationally syndicated show. These people are dangerous and often have a dart-laden photograph of Ryan Seacrest in their one-room efficiency apartment. Shy away from them.
On the opposite end are the "weirdo-wacko-gonnabes". (Again let me stress: I’m keeping the language on a professional level.) These are the radio people who once had it all: the highly paid jobs, the 13-year girls, the bail bondsmen, the high-priced defense attorneys, the adulation and adoration. They’re on their way down the ladder of success and the only good thing you can say about their situation is that the ladder is propped up against the back of a liquor store.
Yes, many deejays drink for many reasons. Mostly because science has proven that alcohol is a preservative and is one of the best ways to keep 41-year-old DJs looking younger if their marketing department can’t afford Photoshop.
Many radio people are in a “12 step program” which means they are usually no further away from alcohol or drugs than 12 steps.
A Special Calling
At this point, you may be wondering why anyone would become a DJ. And I respond to you: Public Service.
- Somebody has to be willing to get up at all odd hours of the day to work a 20-hour week.
- Somebody has to be willing to accept free promotional t-shirts and wear them as business attire.
- Somebody has to be willing to stay unshaven for days at a time because using less plastic disposable razors is just greener.
And that somebody is today’s deejay – the Pilot of the Airwaves – the “Sully” Sullenbergers of Radio!
