not an F.C.C. Commissioner was stirring, not even Michael Powell.
Licenses were hung by the chimney with care,
in hopes the F.C.C. would renew them this year.
SIRIUS execs were snug in their bed,
while visions of Howard Stern danced in their heads.
XM and Opie and Anthony were ready,
as the competition was about to become rather steady.
When on top of my antenna there rose such gyration,
it sounded like 1200 Clear Channel stations!
The red lights on the tower illuminated the night,
when a blurry shadow came into my sight.
All of a sudden as clear as my chin,
was a sleigh and 8 reindeer driven by Mel Karmazin.
Now Cumulus! Infinity! and Citadel, too!
On Jefferson Pilot and Beasley woohoo!
To the top of this FM tower we’ll ride,
knowing Marconi’s right by our side!
And then, with a twinkle, I heard on top of my home,
a transmitter fire up and spit out its ohms.
It sputtered and spewed then it did modulate,
as Karmazin just smiled and pondered its fate.
With satellite, ipods and Internet, too,
he wondered how AM and FM would do.
The competition was stiff, the choices quite many,
who in the future would have listeners aplenty?
He spoke not a word, knew his purpose was deemed,
and filled all the headphones with new audio streams.
Then laying his finger on top of his nose,
up the FM tower Karmazin rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
and away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,
best of luck to all - it’s gonna be quite a fight!
- Corey Deitz
